I Don't Wanna Cry
by The Little Monster 1024
Summary: There had to be another way.
1. Prologue

**I Don't Wanna Cry**

**Chapter One**

**AN: Another fic. I know I know. Finish the other ones first! I'm sorry!**

* * *

Castle didn't even feel the rain as it fell. He only noticed it when it slid down her face, leaving what little bit of mascara that she was wearing to run down in dark streaks. His eyes then shifted to his daughter whose hair was soaking wet. She'd normally be freaking out, knowing that the rain would make her hair frizzy.

The water was making his jacket heavy. He had to rapidly blink to see.

"You have your options, Mr. Castle." The man said in a deep voice.

"Your muse." He said, pulling tightly on Kate's hair. She winced and tried to move her arms again, which was useless as they were bound tightly behind her back. Her knees were sinking into the mud. At her sudden movement the man pushed her closer to the side of the bridge where he was threatening to throw her. "Or your daughter." He said with a wicked smile, nodding over to Alexis who was being held by two women, one pointed a gun to her head.

He felt like he was going to throw up. _Take me!_ He had pleaded moments ago. They wouldn't settle for that. He was supposed to choose between Kate; his muse, his partner, lover, his always. Or Alexis; his beautiful, talented daughter whose life was just beginning.

He knew he had to choose Alexis. But how could he let Kate go? How? They just began their lives together. What would he tell the boys? Gates? Oh god, her dad. How could he tell her Dad? He couldn't do that. He couldn't rip the man's daughter from him; she was all Jim had left. There had to be another way.

"There's no other way." The man said, as if reading Castle's thoughts.

He was right. There was no one around. He had no backup. He was told if he told anyone that they'd kill them both. And he couldn't take that chance.

He looked over at his daughter, his beautiful baby girl. Her eyes were squeezed shut and she was shaking. Her fists were clenched and her head hung low. It took all the strength he had not to run and pull her into his arms and tell her it was all just a bad dream. He wanted to tuck her into bed with Monkey Bonkey and promise to see her in the morning. But he couldn't. If he moved anyway toward her they'd throw Kate over the edge and shoot Alexis.

His eyes darted to Kate whose eyes were focused on him. She was in so much pain. He could tell. What had they done to her? She had bruises on her face and arms that were stretched tightly behind her back. He thought back to the last time she had been with him. Four days ago they had woken up together in his bed. For once there wasn't a case. He had actually woken up before her. He remembered smiling at her sleeping face. Her hair had air dried since their shower the previous night and was splayed out around the pillow in the spirals that she hated. He thought it made her look so young and relaxed.

"I can't wait forever." He said. "What's it going to be?"

Castle looked back and forth between the two of them. "C-can I speak with them?"

"Hmm." He hummed, rolling his head from side to side. "You know what; I'm feeling generous so I'll let you talk to Katie here." He said, tugging on her hair again.

Her eyes snapped shut in pain, but then quickly opened to find his. Castle didn't know what to do. Did he walk to her? Was it a trick?

"Hurry up and get your ass over here or this privilege can be taken away." He shouted.

His stole a look at Alexis who remained still, her eyes still clamped shut. Castle swallowed hard and turned back to the man and nodded toward Kate. "Can you untie her? Please? You're hurting her."

The man snorted. "Yeah, and why do we hand over our guns while we're at it."

Castle took a step closer. "At least loosen the rope…"

"Come on!" He said. "Time's running out. You've got three minutes."

"Castle." She said. "Please." He didn't miss the crack in her voice.

He took one more look at him before he rushed forward and dropped to his knees in front of her. When he saw her up close he gasped. She had a black eye that he missed because of her running mascara and dark bruises. "Kate what did they do to you?" He said, gently placing a hand on either side of her face.

"Doesn't matter." She whispered, staring into his eyes. She wondered if he could tell she was crying. She hoped not. "You have to save Alexis."

He shook his head. "There has to be another way. I can't let him-"

"No." She cut him off. "We've met our match this time Castle."

Castle knew that she was right. Oh Kate. He wiped away the mascara from under her eyes and brushed a strand of wet hair from her face with the other. He nodded slowly. "I'm so sorry." He said, pressing a soft kiss to her lips. "I'm so sorry, Kate."

She shook her head. "You didn't do this." She whispered against her lips.

"I didn't find you in time." He said, kissing her more fiercely, never wanting to pull away from their last kiss.

She reluctantly pulled away. "No, Castle. Please don't think that." She said, a sob escaping her lips. "Don't live the rest of your life like this."

He kissed her forehead. "I'm so sorry." He repeated, his own tears mixing with the rain.

She leaned into his lips the best she could. "I love you, Castle."

"I love you too." He whispered, caressing her cheek with his thumb. "Always."

"Always." She choked out.

* * *

_**FOUR DAYS EARLIER**_

* * *

**AN: MUHAHA. Sorry guys. (: Review telling me what you think?**


	2. Rare Moments

**I Don't Wanna Cry**

**Chapter Two**

**AN: Thanks so much for the feedback! :D**

* * *

_**FOUR DAYS EARLIER**_

* * *

He watched the faint smile on her face, the rise and fall of her chest. She looked beautiful as the sun danced across her skin, as so much was exposed in her small tank top. Her hair had air dried after their shower and now sun-kissed chestnut spirals were splayed across the pillow. He loved her hair like that; so relaxed, calm, and young.

It took so much restraint to not reach out and run a hand through the soft curls or to place a soft kiss against her jaw. But he wouldn't. This was such a rare moment for them. Kate didn't have to go into the precinct until four. It was even rarer that he woke up before her. Before she woke up and the stress of the day took over her. She was at ease and would wake up with a smile that could take his breath away.

They were all alone in the loft. His mother was in the Hamptons with some old friends for the week and Alexis was away at college. They could have a quiet morning and afternoon. God knows they needed Working the case of an arsonist turned serial killer who had claimed the lives of seven people the previous week had really taken a tool on their lives.

They'd been so stressed, even had a fight. It had been stupid really. Fought for an hour because Castle said she needed to take a break, which led to her telling him that he didn't need to treat her like a child, which then led to Kate returning to her apartment for the night; only to have her show up an hour later. He was so surprised. He was usually the one to apologize. After everything was resolved they settled into bed, skipped the make-up sex, both knowing that at the time cuddling was enough. That was surprising too; he never pegged Kate as a cuddler.

So many surprises. He thought he already knew pretty everything about her. He was _wrong_, oh so wrong.

Movement next to him pulled him from his thoughts. He looked down to see Kate stirring and eventually her eyes fluttered open meeting him as he noticed his staring. She gave him a small smile. "Hey." She breathed.

He grinned at her. "Hey."

"Staring." She muttered, turning to her side and burying her face in the pillow.

Castle laughed and reached out to run his hands through her hair, pulling one piece out far and then letting it go, watching it fall back into a curl. "Can't help it."

She rolled her eyes into the pillow before turning back over to her side to face him. "I can't believe you woke up before me."

He nodded. "I know. Weird."

"What time is it?"

"Uh," He rolled over to look at the clock behind him. "9:30." He said, returning to his previous position to look at her.

"Wow." She muttered as she leaned forward to press a kiss on his lips. "late."

Castle returned the kiss gently. "Well we didn't get to sleep until what, 2 a.m.?"

Kate shrugged and gave him a mischievous grin. "Did I wear you out too much Castle? Can't handle that much in one night in your old age?" She joked.

He growled before launching forward, pinning her to the mattress as he leaned over her to whisper into her ear. "I believe you were the one to fall asleep first last night." She shivered at the breath against her ear. "Too much for you to handle?"

Kate felt her breath catch in her throat. "Well, I…" She paused as a smile spread across her face. "Just kiss me Castle."

* * *

About two hours later, now showered and dressed, they emerged from the bedroom to find something to eat. Castle looked down at his watch and then back at Kate. "Do you want breakfast or early lunch?" He asked, already knowing the answer. She didn't really like breakfast, that's why she hardly ever ate it.

"Lunch." She said, settling on a stool as he moved around the kitchen. "Why? Whatcha makin'?" She asked teasingly.

Castle thought about making something. He looked around the kitchen, glancing in cabinets, and the fridge. Huh. They really needed to make a trip to the store. He inwardly smiled at the fact that he acted like this was her house. _They_ need to go to the grocery so they'd have something to eat in _their_ house. He tucked that thought away and looked at her. "Uh, Chinese?"

She smiled. "When have I ever said no to Chinese?"

* * *

An hour later Castle and Beckett found themselves curled up on the couch, Chinese food in hand and scrolling trough the TV options.

"Do you like cop shows?" Castle asked, looking over at her. He knew she wasn't paying attention. Her back was against the side of the couch with her legs out in front of her, her feet in Castle's lap. He poked her foot gently. "Hey."

"Hm? Oh," She said, realizing she was staring off into space. "Sorry. What'd you say?"

He chuckled and sat his empty carton on food on the coffee table to rub her foot gently, "I asked if you like cop shows." He said. "You know _Bones_, or _Criminal Minds_, or…oh! _Rizzoli and Isles_!"

Kate grinned. "Now, why do I have a feeling that the only reason you like Rizzoli and Isles is because of the hot cop and ME?"

He grinned. "Why would I need to watch a hot cop on TV when I have one of my own?"

Kate laughed and poked his chest with her toe. "Yeah, I guess I watch some cop shows. I really like _Criminal Minds_."

"Hm." Castle said.

"What?"

"I just thought that you weren't really a fan of the FBI."

Kate smiled. "Well if an FBI agent that looks like agent Morgan wants to walk in an run my precint, I won't object."

"Oh my god Kate!" He gasped.

Kate lifted her foot and pushed into his chin with her toe. "Close your mouth; you'll catch flies." She smirked.

* * *

**AN: YAY! Quickest update I think I've ever had. Review? **


End file.
